Messy Blotches on Newly Stretched Canvas—Unruly Heart, Persisting Thoughts

What do you do when aspects of
Older, exposed wounds
Partially crusted over
Gape at sloppy seams
Still?

Fascinating to behold
Under a magnifying glass
The beginnings of restitch,
Reupholstering.
Thin epidermis layers
Laid across the badland,
Skin cell by skin cell.

Mostly, you leave things alone,
Touched only gingerly, if at all.
Daily efforts focus on
Giving the indent fresh air to heal
While keeping the area clean.

But like the space in your mouth
After you lose a tooth,
You find that your mind,
Flitting about,
Returns to that empty space with
Reruns
Replays
Creating hypothetical
Future scenarios that
Will not happen but you keep
Constructing them, nevertheless,
Fueling your heart with anger,
Still.

Paint cans tipped over
Spilling toxic stained mess
Unwelcome oil blotches
On newly drawn canvas landscape
Still.

You know you need to
Figure out how to let go
Of being so “wronged”
And move forward,
One way or another—

Be happy with this choice,
Don’t look back and
Forge ahead with
Recasted, hairline fractured
Forgiveness.

Or, determine that
This person causes too much
Frustration, fear, cannot be trusted
Still
And thus isn’t
The right partner for you and
Move forward with that prong.

But to continue picking at
Uncommon scars
Gross and swollen puffy
In their itchy make,
Especially when apart
While also fiercely
Loving the sacral dip, when together,
Is enough to drive
A rational, analytical person mad.

Discern
Discover
Decide

Messy

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