Healing: Confessions of a Non-Runner Running

Sunday am started with a loud “Bang!”
Before the sun had risen.

Partner accidentally rolled off the bed,
Had fallen on the floor
And was moaning for help.
Startled from sleep,
I lept up and turned on the light,
Afraid his back was broken
Or something else devastating.

The only damage
Was a skinned knee and
Him feeling shook up
From the unpleasant surprise.
I put ointment and a Band Aid
On the knee as much to
Reassure him emotionally as
To encourage healing
And then left him in bed to resume
Decimating forests
With additional log sawing.

My morning improved.
Blueberry banana pancake and
Coffee feasting followed the incident
(I needed a reward after what
I had just been through,
Didn’t I?)
Also supplemented by
Brain stretching with my
Daily gratitude notes as well as
Making a fun list for,

“What does your ideal
Solo movie night look like?”

Sooner than later though,
I need to make my legs work again.
A light breeze and
Medium strength sunshine
Blanket the region and
I need to get up and out running
In this perfect spring weather.

I do wish I enjoyed the pursuit more.

“Running is life,”

A long, tall guy once remarked.
Not much of a runner,
I personally disagree with
Such a statement.
Much more of a swimmer,
I love feeling light while
Moving through water
Harkening back to some
Primordial instinct of
The way things used to be
For us as a species.
Running feels so much heavier
And more difficult.

I still make myself run
Sometimes though because
I appreciate the benefits
Of cross training.

Plus, there is something appealing
About being able to strap on
Just a pair of trusty sneakers,
Get outdoors wherever I am,
And breathe deeply while
Moving my arms and legs.
When I’m going at a maintainable pace,
Running allows my mind to wander
More freely and with
Less judgement than usual.
There are no pools, ice rinks,
Elaborate Pilates apparatus or
Large, expensive animals
(Like horses) needed.

But my short legs can only take little steps.
My feet hit the ground quickly
Making miniature dog nail
“Tap, tap, taps” on gravel.
I keep my stride purposely tiny
To prevent stretching my legs out too far,
Which results in IT band pain.

Also, if I try to go too fast,
My lungs feel like they are
On the brink of exploding.
Cold white pain fills my rib cage
As I wheez while catching my breath.
Even 5K races have called for
The aid of Ibuterol inhalers
These past few years.

Thus, I allow taller, longer strided folks
Which can include young children
To easily pass my panting self.
Sometimes people whizzing by
Are even engaged in
Lively conversation!

I notice these people run differently.
After they step with a “Tap!”
There is a pause before the next step.
They appear able to defy time and gravity
With a kind of aerodynamic suspension
Unbeknownst to me.
The space between each step
Seems like Eternity

I didn’t end up running today.
I swam and used the gym instead.
Tomorrow is another day.



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