Maddening Desolation During the Holidays

Falling.
Arms and legs
Sprawling
Flailing
Grabbing spider webs to
Try to slow my fall
Breaking under massive heavy.

Whoosh!

Nothing left to catch me.

I have so much but
Speed downwards anyway.
Holiday rush
Headlong yet
Devoid of cheer.

Too much work
A Royal toothache
Make all the shiny to-do threads
Shabby somehow
Instead of handholds to look forward to.

Social media painting
Dulled emotional strokes
An addictive Novocain
Pulls me further under
While feeding
“Connection,”
“Sharing”.

Too little work.
Instead of reveling in
Lighted peace and Time
I’d worry about missing out on
“Community” and making money.

The impossibility of my torn nature
Confounds me
A desolate, self imposed
Zero sum game I’m losing.
Will I ever be happy?
Why is living so hard sometimes?
How long will I live anyway?

The roar and bustle
Others around me.
Loneliness amid a Maddening crowd.

Maddening

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s